Roger The Ripped Kangaroo Has Died At 12

The world has lost yet another legend today. Roger The Kangaroo has sadly passed away at the age of 12 due to natural causes. Roger rose to internet fame in 2015 when a video surfaced of his chiseled body crushing a metal bucket. He literally crushes a bucket the way my scrawny ass would crush an empty beer can. There is zero doubt in my small brain that this kangaroo would have absolutely kicked my ass all across Australia if we ever faced off. He literally looks like he stands outside of elementary schools and robs children of their lunches and then knocks their textbooks out of their hands.


This bad ass literally looks like he’s carved from stone. His biceps are eerily similar to Hulk Hogan in the late 80s. Makes me wonder if some sick fuck found Roger in the outback when he was a baby kangaroo and pumped his full of steroids. Like how does he have that physique? I went to the gym religiously for three years and I never looked close to Roger. He must have got his kangaroo paws on some copies of Ronnie Coleman’s workout tapes or something.

Roger was beloved from people on the internet but most importantly to the people who worked at the Kangaroo Sancuatry in Alice Springs, Australia. He may have looked intimidating with his beefy 6 foot 5 inch physique but he was very loving and had a sweet side that the public didn’t see often. Thank you for making us non muscular humans even more insecure about ourselves Roger. You will be missed and we hope you continue to be the most jacked animal in Heaven. Tell Harambe we all said hello. Thanks.

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